I love it when conversations with my HR Director friend Lauren start with: “You’ve GOT to write about this.” I know it’ll be a juicy example.

Here’s the situation.  Lauren’s colleague referred a jobseeking friend to her.  There was an open position that could be a fit, so she passed along the resume, and told her friend to give Lauren a call.

So the jobseeker (we’ll call her Denise) calls Lauren to touch base and see that she got the resume OK.  Great, fine.  Standard protocol.  Lauren knows that it’s tough out there for jobseekers, and this is a referral from a colleague, so she is very friendly (as opposed to how HR Directors normally are—ha ha!) and tells Denise that she has her materials, but won’t have a chance to get to it until she gets back from Florida.  Fair enough.  She’s given Denise a timeline.

However, when Lauren’s in Florida, she gets a voicemail from Denise asking about the status of her application.  Hmmm.  So perhaps Denise missed the detail about her being out of town, but I know my friend—and I know that she always changes her voicemail to let people know when she’s out of the office.  So Denise heard the message, and instead of saying “oh DUH, she told me that last week” and hanging up, she left a message.  But did Denise really think that a decision was being made that week with the Director out of town?

Ok—I’m sure you’re thinking—Melanie—these are not grievous sins. You need to chill a bit.   And you’re right…but then it gets bad.

So Lauren calls Denise back when she returns to remind her that she was away, no decision was made and that she’ll call her if she is a fit—no worries.  If she matches what they’re looking for—Denise will be the first to know.

However, Denise has persisted to call Lauren at least once, if not twice a week, for at least 3 weeks.   So now not only is my friend NOT going to hire this candidate because she can’t follow directions and has made a nuisance of herself, Denise is making her friend who referred her to Lauren look bad; and in many cases, that’s the worse offense of all.

To put the shoe on the other foot, let’s flip this example for a minute.  Let’s say that Denise went car shopping and gave her phone number to a salesman at a dealership.  She was just looking at the new models, had an idea of what she wanted, but wasn’t ready to pull the trigger on the purchase yet.  But that salesman kept calling.  And although Denise was fair with him and said that she was still evaluating and would call him if she was going to buy a car with him, he persisted to call.

Is Denise really going to buy a car that she doesn’t want JUST to get this guy to stop calling?  The car doesn’t meet her needs, she had something else in mind, but she finally dropped $20K to just get the phone calls to end?

Who does that?

No—you buy the car you want and need based on your criteria. However seemingly irrational your criteria may seem to your friends, family and colleagues, that’s what you decided to purchase.  It makes you happy—you feel good about it, and you have a new set of wheels.

So yes.  I know it is tough out there.  Believe me.  I attend at least one jobseeking group per week.  I hear it all and see it all.  But I’m BEGGING YOU!!!  ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS evaluate what you’re doing relative to its ability to get you hired.

Think of yourself as a very valuable, expensive product that people are looking to buy, and think about the big purchases you’ve made.  Why did you make the decisions that you did?  What was it about the salesperson or the product that gently steered you toward the product, or highlighted how it fit your needs the best?  THAT is what you need to do.

And understand, that what’s printed in the job description is only half the story.  There’s an entire emotional/chemistry component that goes into hiring someone that should not be dismissed.

Pieces of paper don’t get hired.  People do.